I Don’t Care if you’re Meghan Markle or Kim from Next Door – Slut Shaming is Never Okay.

Mamamia – we need to talk.

A couple of days ago I was scrolling my Facebook feed and one of your articles popped up, as is often the case. One of my friend’s had commented, “How is this appropriate or necessary?” (or something to that effect). I scrolled down the comments on your post and found all of them reflected my friend’s sentiments. You had made people angry.

So naturally, I grabbed a glass of wine and settled in for a read to see what had the women of Facebook up in arms.

The article in question was titled, “Prince Harry wasn’t the first famous person Meghan Markle had a romance with.”

Who would have thought it? A successful actress has had romances with other famous people.

Shock fucking horror.

Anyway, I digress slightly, as this wasn’t really the reason I was getting increasingly pissed off as I read through Meghan’s black book.

What did piss me off though was the way it was written.

“The royal wedding is just a week away, but why focus on the union of two people in love when you can instead just go deep on Meghan Markle‘s exes for no reason other than… fun?

That’s right.



Even if this article was written in jest, with tongue firmly in cheek, it still does what so many of us are fighting to stop, ironically yourself included. Mamamia, you’re slut shaming Meghan Markle and I’m not okay with it.

If I call someone a racist name, is it okay if I let them know I’m just doing it for fun first?


If my boss grabs my ass and tells me I look great today and then when I get offended, follows it up with telling me to “relax, it was just a bit of fun”, does that make it okay?


Getting the gist yet?

You are calling out a woman for having relationships prior to her current one and even though you do defend her through the article, you are still calling her out. You are making it a thing for her to have seen other famous people before meeting Prince Harry, like no-one else in the world has ever had an office romance or five. Hell, if that’s the case, then Meghan and I are more similar than I ever thought. I’ve had a few office romances (thankfully I work for a very large organisation so there haven’t been too many awkward run-ins with the ex!). That doesn’t make me a slut, it makes me a normal woman who kissed a few frogs before she found her “prince”.

I don’t care if Meghan’s list has five names on it or 200. It’s 2018 and it’s time to stop making this a thing. Strong, independent women are allowed to have as many bloody relationships as they want and not be made to feel bad about it.

How do I explain to my girls as they get older that men and women are equal when the media continues to have a different set of rules for us both, even if it just in the name of “fun”?

I want my girls to know that it’s their choice to have as many romances as they please, provided they are safe and always feel like they have a voice. They have the right to kiss all of the frogs in the world if they really want to before they find their prince, or princess as the case may be. Just like Meghan Markle did.

Five Days and One Menstrual Cup

Since becoming a mum, I have learnt many things. Quite a few of those things are about how I as a person, have changed, mostly for the good I’d say. I’m more compassionate, I love deeper, I am more aware of the impact of my actions and I share more. A lot more.

Maybe too much.

“TMI” seems to be my middle name these days, and this post I’m afraid is going to be no exception.

If you don’t like talking about your period, vaginas, or things that go inside of your vagina, then I’m just letting you know upfront that this blog post is not for you.

Close the page now.

Okay, still with me? Let’s get to the gross stuff.

I hate having a period. I was a late bloomer – 15 or 16 from memory. Have never been regular and am horrible at predicting when I’m about to start my next cycle. Being on the pill for the best part of 15 years helped these issues and life was pretty peachy keen until I decided to start trying for a baby.

Goodbye pill, hello unpredictability!

Fast forward two pregnancies and over a year of breastfeeding each time resulting in about three glorious period-free years in my life and here we were, just a couple of months ago. My period was back and I was not happy.

Not so much with the actual period itself – I didn’t mind the blood, I just hated the inconvenience of it all. The pads – gross. The tampons – gross. The constant trips to the toilet, kids in tow, weapon of choice carefully concealed somewhere discreet – I was always a fan of a tampon in my bra…

But I digress. I had had enough!

I had seen a few posts and things on the internet about menstrual cups and while a super foreign concept, I figured I had nothing to lose and made my purchase online.

Day One

Once again my period has managed to sneak up on me and take me by surprise.

“Not this time”, I think to myself as I get my little pack out of the vanity. Thankfully, it’s a Friday afternoon and I’m not due back at work until Wednesday so the timing is perfect to give this thing a go with little fear of public embarrassment, unlike that one time at a school concert where there wasn’t a toilet close by…

I follow the instructions and fold my cup into a “C” shape and pop it into place. It’s easy enough, but takes a bit of fiddling to get it right. The internet tells me it’s going to take several cycles to nail it, so I’m not too worried.

I’m pleasantly surprised by how comfortable it is, and head off to sleep for the night.

Day Two

Overnight is a success! No leaks, and no urge to run from the bed to the loo as soon as I get upright as is the case sometimes when using tampons.

I remove the cup as instructed in the shower and pop it back into place with a bit of difficulty. I can now relax for 12 hours until I need to change it again.

Yes. 12 HOURS.

Day Three

Another night with no dramas and a trip out of the house, wearing a liner just to be safe. Still, there are no incidents and I start to get cocky. I feel like I’ve cracked the period code.

Cue 14 hours later when I’ve forgotten to change my cup and find myself with a dirty big stain on my undies. I take the cup out thinking it’s full, but it’s not. I think it’s moved a little during the course of the day and the seal has broken, creating a leak.

Lesson learnt – a little readjusting throughout the day doesn’t go astray.

Day Four

I’ve been having a bit of trouble getting the cup to fall into place properly when inserted, so I consult the internet and find a useful video on different folding methods. I try the “Punch Down” fold and immediately find it better. I’ve also decided to trim the stem which also helps with not noticing it’s there at all.

Day Five

Things are wrapping up for me this cycle and I’ve made it. five days with no tampons, no pads. A couple of liners which I consider my safety net for now.

It sounds silly, but I am proud of myself for taking a chance and trying something new and definitely not mainstream. For saving a couple of dollars a month on items I can’t stand buying. For switching to something more environmentally friendly.

So for those of you curious about menstrual cups – my advice is just give it a go. If you don’t like it, go back to what you were doing before. I’m sure they’re not everyone’s cup of tea (okay, that’s kinda gross), but I’m sure there are a lot of you out there who assume, like I used to, that there are no other options besides the sanitary items in your local supermarket.

So where do you find your perfect cup? Start here.

Good luck!

Edit* I’ll be grabbing a pair or two of Modibodi’s undies to use as my back up instead of liners to make my cycle zero waste. Go me! See the range here.

Unpopular Opinion: Why I Won’t be Buying my Kids Christmas Themed Outfits

Christmas is eight weeks away. Actually, it’s more like seven and a half. If you are a good Mum (I most certainly am not…) you will have already started your Christmas shopping. If you are an AMAZING Mum, you may have already finished it. Ugh, I feel dirty just writing that. To clarify, I’m usually the Mum who is still shopping for presents on Christmas Eve. I can’t be perfect 100% of the time okay? Give me a break.

Anyway, enough about me, back to the good Mums…

I know there’s a lot of you around, because I see you everyday on Instagram and Facebook, filling my feeds with questions about where I can buy the perfect Christmas outfit. And look, I get it. It’s super cute. Christmas is a day to get dressed up, take photos and document our cute little cherubs in all their glory before they turn into grumpy teenagers who do nothing but glare at you when you point a camera their way.


It’s not for me…


Love this dress so much I just realised I bought one close to identical for myself on the weekend. Not sorry.

I’m all for dressing the kids up in something special, but I can’t justify the cost of dressing them up in something that they’re going to wear once. Literally once. You can’t re-use Christmas outfits. Those snowflakes (why do our Christmas outfits even have snowflakes on them… It’s literally 35 degrees some years), trees, reindeer and Santas cannot be recycled for birthdays, Easter, even New Years one week later. From December 26, that outfit you just spent a chunk of money on is effectively useless.

Again. Sorry.

As you may have read, I am currently on a bit of a spending slowdown, so I guess maybe I’m a little oversensitive to this sort of thing this year. If you’re all for Christmas cheer and you’re reading this thinking I’m the biggest Grinch on the Internet, then that’s cool. Let’s agree to disagree. I’m still going to coo at the adorable pictures of your kiddies in their Christmas finest. I’m just not going to do it myself.

Like in years past, I will potentially get the girls a new dress to wear, but I may not. The dress Avery wore when she was two is perfect for Niamh this year, It’s white and sparkly and very festive. Just not Christmassy festive. And, while I think about it, the dress Avery wore last year is still sitting in her wardrobe and will probably fit her still if I choose that for her to wear on Christmas Day (haha, she’s four. She will choose what she wants to wear.) And yep, I know, I’ve just said that Avery might wear the same thing two Christmases in a row, so why couldn’t she do that with a Christmas themed outfit? She could, and then she would have worn that particular item twice, not once. Great, but in contrast, the outfit Avery wore last year has been used many times during the year for all sorts of special events. In my eyes, much better value for money.

Cute AF and got to wear this outfit (sans hat) a crapload

So yep. While I’ll be trimming the tree, going all OCD with the wrapping paper and nagging Benji that we really do need Christmas lights on our house this year, I won’t be shopping for Christmas-themed outfits for the girls. May the mums of Instagram still see it in their hearts to double-click on my pics come December 25.